A recent study into who the world’s Sexiest Bald Man is has placed Britain’s Prince William in first place. However, the public’s response to this vitally exciting poll has been decidedly lacklustre and muted.
Although it must be disheartening when one’s hairline recedes, it’s a cloud with a silver lining: quite apart from the easy maintenance, women have a liking for bald men, and the internet abounds with stories about who the most likeable, or sexiest, bald celebs are.
Whatever the case, the most recent survey, placing Prince William – eldest son to heir to the British throne, Prince Charles – on the winners’ podium, caused an uproar as soon as it was reported by the Sun.
According to the study, conducted by cosmetic surgery specialists Longevita, Prince William has been described as “sexy” 17.6 million times across blogs and on internet pages identified using Google.
In comparison, Mike Tyson — who came second — racked up half that number, and actor Jason Statham ranked third, at least in the admittedly dubious findings from a company interested in offering hair transplants. Rapper Pitbull, Michael Jordan, boxer Floyd Mayweather, John Travolta, Bruce Willis, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, and actor Vin Diesel, trailed further behind.
The average reaction to the rankings, evident in the comment sections on Twitter, could be described as a lengthy hmmmmm, with many begging leave to doubt some obvious omissions.
Here they are, by the way – those who could have easily thrown down the gauntlet to the prince, but were sadly missed out of the race:
- Bartender Stanley Tucci didn’t make the cut, but racked up quite a few likes online, with many recalling his recent top-watched tutorials on Instagram, and his own food-centric show on CNN, “Searching for Italy”.
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- Sherlock Holmes’s star Mark Strong
Mark Strong would like a word… pic.twitter.com/oHiNoW3tG5
- Rapper LL Cool J
WAYMENT! I thought we’d all agreed that LL Cool J was the hottest bald man alive! I thought this was settled 20+ years ago!🥰 https://t.co/EUHp3ovLy1 pic.twitter.com/PrWj954goP
— 🚀ℕ𝕚𝕂𝕂𝕚✨ (@HeyNikki1) March 27, 2021
- Star Trek star Sir Patrick Stewart
Have you seen Sir Patrick Stewart? pic.twitter.com/nZlnP1L2Xf
— ᴊᴇʟᴀ➴ (@jelevision) March 27, 2021
- Stand-up icon Louis CK
584. Louis C.K 2017 (2017, Louis C.K).
Louis C.K es uno de los mejores cómicos de stand up que ha habido y posiblemente en el podio de la actualidad. Sus guiones fluyen solos y nunca se sienten forzados, son maravillosamente punzantes, inteligentes y divertidos (7,5/10). pic.twitter.com/43AZhTMU0P
— Sr. Gallagher (@jorgeriveira14) March 30, 2021
- Goodfellas. Pulp Fiction, and Hard Eight (and what not) star Samuel L. Jackson
You are going bald,.soon you will look just like @SamuelLJackson pic.twitter.com/lN347sLuek
— Ogbame Justus ⚪️ (@ogbame_justus) December 27, 2019
- Amazon founder Jeff Bezos
Jeff Bezos to Become First Amazon Worker to Get a Break: https://t.co/BweBQ0hjhG pic.twitter.com/25qHxa1cv0
— Reductress (@Reductress) March 27, 2021
- Real Madrid’s boss Zinedine Zidane, or Zizou
Zinedine Zidane – The Most Elegant Player In The History Of Football
[A MUST READ THREAD] pic.twitter.com/UzEsYuJfgY
— Roy 😷 (@roylmaooo) March 30, 2021
- Bryan Cranston (as Walter White). Here, the chemo-caused baldness made Heisenberg out of a teacher and model father, didn’t it?
Bryan Cranston as Walter White/Heisenberg has to be one of the best TV performances of all time pic.twitter.com/i24h1kd6w7
— Danny Boy 1878 💙 (@DanielE25044152) March 18, 2021
- Actor, comedian and social activist Terry Crews, who appeared in films such as Friday After Next, White Chicks , Idiocracy and the Expendables series.
Terry Crews >>>>>>>>>>> pic.twitter.com/RTyhFKRYFr
— a neta da medusa 🥦 (@meduzace) March 28, 2021
The Fast & Furious and Transformers star Tyrese Gibson
Tyrese Gibson- 42 anos pic.twitter.com/kDrmyg1Vqt
— negra desejo (@kanandanbarros) March 29, 2021