Sexiest Bald Men: Who Should Have Competed With Prince William

A recent study into who the world’s Sexiest Bald Man is has placed Britain’s Prince William in first place. However, the public’s response to this vitally exciting poll has been decidedly lacklustre and muted.

Although it must be disheartening when one’s hairline recedes, it’s a cloud with a silver lining: quite apart from the easy maintenance, women have a liking for bald men, and the internet abounds with stories about who the most likeable, or sexiest, bald celebs are.

Whatever the case, the most recent survey, placing Prince William – eldest son to heir to the British throne, Prince Charles – on the winners’ podium, caused an uproar as soon as it was reported by the Sun.

According to the study, conducted by cosmetic surgery specialists Longevita, Prince William has been described as “sexy” 17.6 million times across blogs and on internet pages identified using Google.
In comparison, Mike Tyson — who came second — racked up half that number, and actor Jason Statham ranked third, at least in the admittedly dubious findings from a company interested in offering hair transplants. Rapper Pitbull, Michael Jordan, boxer Floyd Mayweather, John Travolta, Bruce Willis, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, and actor Vin Diesel, trailed further behind.

The average reaction to the rankings, evident in the comment sections on Twitter, could be described as a lengthy hmmmmm, with many begging leave to doubt some obvious omissions.
Here they are, by the way – those who could have easily thrown down the gauntlet to the prince, but were sadly missed out of the race:

  • Bartender Stanley Tucci didn’t make the cut, but racked up quite a few likes online, with many recalling his recent top-watched tutorials on Instagram, and his own food-centric show on CNN, “Searching for Italy”.

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  • Sherlock Holmes’s star Mark Strong

Mark Strong would like a word…